Don’t Release Me

This site offers two primary types of content:

• My life story, published as “episodes”
• “Articles” covering topics that are important to me, including postings that I call “Perspectives”. These are my personal opinion on certain subjects.

Don’t Release Me has significant personal meaning for me. Think of the name as my profoundly held desire to hold firmly onto those things I care most about in life.

My Story

My story is one of love, loss, betrayal, and survival. What makes my story uniquely interesting is not the individual events but the compilation of them, the dysfunction around me, and the strange circumstances along the way. This is just my life. Some good, a lot of bad, but just life.

I started DRM in 2020 for two reasons: To inspect why my life was torn apart and for my children to know the truth. I’ve been silent until now. My nature of protecting others and leading with my heart wasn’t enough. So now I’m trying a different approach — to tell all — in search of understanding and acknowledgement. The end result is a raw, unfiltered, honest conversation with myself.

Giving up my privacy and putting a spotlight on people in my life is extremely uncomfortable for me. This is not a vindictive tell-all but an entirely new approach to me finding answers. My family comes first, as does their privacy, so I write this anonymously.

I need to heal my heart, to dig deep, and be strong. I’d love to walk away, but I need to fight back. I need to be a model for my children and teach them how to survive incredible loss. By telling my story, I regain control of the narrative, recalibrate my life, and take my power back.

DRM will be a place where people discover my truths but also a resource for women to learn from my life and share theirs. By including curated content along with my story, I hope to help others with similar experiences and challenges.

Call me Nikita

As part of maintaining anonymity, I’ve decided to use the character Nikita Mears as my pseudonym. If you don’t know that name, it’s the main character in the Nikita TV series. Like Nikita, my old life was taken from me. I’ve been betrayed by those I love. I’ve had to learn to be fierce and unemotional. And I’ve undergone a transformation I never expected. When the dust clears, I’ll be smarter, stronger, and I’d like to think, still alive.

Disclaimer: This blog is a memoir. It reflects the author’s present recollections of experiences over time. Names and characteristics have been changed, certain events, dialogue and characters have been created for the purposes of fictionalization and anonymity, and some dialogue has been recreated.

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